Planetary Pronunciation Gone South
First, there was a question of the location of the spare
toilet paper. @ couldn’t find it. He looked in the right places. I told him to
check the shelf at eye level. Oops, wrong eyes. TG had put it at eye level,
except it was his eye level. (Remember, the T stands for Tall…) Even better, it
was at the back of the shelf.
TG's choice of TP placement brought on a discussion of whether he was opposed
to @ actually using toilet paper. TG claimed he was trying to get @ to think about
Star Trek. @ had to think a second… Wait, Klingons? Yep.
“Stop… that’s not
funny.”
Somehow that brought up a question of pronunciation. Specifically, is the name of the planet pronounced yur-ay-niss or yurin-us?
Where’s the syllable emphasis? Is it a long a
or a short a? Because yur-ay-niss just sounds gross and yurin-us doesn’t sound much better and it doesn’t even make sense anyway. I mean, why would pee come out of something labeled with a word that actually has the word has anus in it? See, it doesn't make sense at all.
“Mom! Stop.”
Come on @, we just want you to think about astronomy. You
know, like exploring dark space.
“Stop… That’s not
funny. It's just not funny.” He threatened to lock us out of the house.
But dude, you have to be careful. Seriously. You have to watch
out for the black holes.
At that point he figured out that we were already in the
house, which made locking us out of the house strategically difficult. So, he went out the front door and stood on the porch. And rang the
doorbell to annoy the dogs.
Brown dog
didn’t know whether to pay attention to the kid and the doorbell or check on the hysterically
laughing humans in the kitchen. The black dog didn’t care. He’s deaf and
unfazed by my antics. I was busy laughing.
Have times changed so much? Do all eleven-year-old boys get
ticked off about bodily function humor? Or is it just my eleven-year-old?
Thankfully, he explained.
“Mom, it’s gross. I
don’t expect that behavior from you. It’s inappropriate. You’re a mom. You’re
an adult.”
I know I’m a mom, but do I gotta be an adult too?
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